much as this is something women, especially women of a *certain age*, don’t like to talk about, here goes.

around november last year i started getting the first signs of peri-menopause; that series of symptoms that lets you know you are nearing the point where to everybody else, you will be, officially ancient. the old crone. :/

i started waking up in pools of sweat, the pillow soaked, rivulets running down my body. or i’d be standing on set, getting ready for a scene and suddenly i would feel myself glowing, beads of moisture forming along my hair-line, grabbing a script with which to fan myself before the make-up artist would have to come running with her powder.

this would never do.

went to see my doctor and she prescribed a low-dose pill, mirelle, which she said ought to tide me through these symptoms.

started the pack at the beginning of december. by as early as a few weeks later, i started feeling the first signs of a low-grade depression. couldn’t tell if it was the pill or just me. couldn’t tell if it was getting worse or not, but by new year, i was in a miserable state, dark clouds following me everywhere and 10 days into the second pack, on my birthday, a few days ago, i was ready to jump off a bridge. for days it had felt like i was in a plummeting  elevator, heading straight for a spectacular crash in the basement. i started wondering if it wasn’t time to start taking a happy pill.

i realized it was time to call my doctor and just check whether it was possible for the contraceptive pill to be making me feel so miserable.

apparently it absolutely is! i’m one of those few women who cannot handle even that low dose of hormones. she advocated that i stop immediately and said that depression is one of the main reasons for women to go off the pill.

anyway, it’s 2 days later and i already feel a million times better. i guess i feel relief just being able to pinpoint a reason why i was feeling to inexplicably, uncontrollably depressed.

so, looks like pollyanna might be on her way back. she might still have to take public transport to get here, but she’s on her way, that’s for sure and i, for one, will be very glad to see her! 🙂

10 thoughts on “pill-popping…

  1. I’ve been on Dianne 35 for the past 3 years for my acne, and sometimes things can depress and upset me so much I actually think about killing myself, and I also became alot more sensitive and moody because of it, thought about changing but its not a constant state, just some days, and I rather have clear skin.

    It’s amazing how it can affect you.

    • yeah, i think the worst part was not having a clue why i was feeling so miz! looking forward to leaving it all behind me! thanks gina.

  2. I’m actually another one of those women who can’t handle the pill. I went into a horrific spiraling depression for a long time – into a very very very deep dark place. I realized that it got worse once a month. So did some research and wella – did a experiment by going off them and no more depression. That was the progestron ones.

    Also I’m allergic to the estrogen ones, they caused a fibroid the size of a 12 week fetus to grow inside of me! I had it removed but it developed within six months of taking the pill.

    I’ve heard that a lot of women have begun to go through pill depression. I wonder if they’ve changed the ingredients??!

    Glad you feel better.

    • truly, i started feeling better almost immediately i found out that it was the pill. it helped to know the source of the depression. amazing how many women are so nonchalantly on the pill – i was too, for 18 yrs and never realized it affected me, till i tried to get back on it! guess, we won’t be doing any pill-popping! 😉

  3. Pingback: to your health. « Cyber Sass – My Whorl

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