bust a move!

a life-time of ballet, dancing, gymning, cardio-kick-boxing, hooping, cycling, hiking and just generally being active and taking my body for granted , seems to have finally caught up with me.

i’ve spent most of the last two months sitting, thinking that taking a rest-cure would help heal my incredibly painful back and knee. not so much. the only thing that happened is that my lard-ass grew even lardier. and at my age, let me tell you, once you gain weight  it’s like a damn leech – it just does not want to let go.

i finally took to twitter looking for a chiropractor to see if that would sort me out. amazingly, 3 (incredibly painful) sessions later, after some dry-needling (yup, i once again was getting jabbed), some electrical stimulation and some major chiropractic adjustments, i’m moving again.

i even have a new personal trainer who miraculously made her appearance out of n0-where. she comes to my house, she adjusts her schedule to suit me and we’re taking things really easy. ok, so i have yet to go and see a physio about my knee, but for now i’m sticking my head in the sand where that’s concerned. i’m just so glad to get up off my saartjie baartman butt and get moving again.

hallelujah!

burning it off…

i’m going to burning man. (does maniacally  gleeful dance).

yes, i’m going to burning man. there are some old-school, longtime burners who have  written off the playa and are now venturing on to other realities. i understand that the annual burning man trek is a huge undertaking, which occupies most of the year and despite being a gifting community, ends up costing a not insubstantial amount of money. $2000 is not a bad guesstimate for what the average person spends on getting to burning man – and that’s if you live in the states. now take into account the burners who come from all the far-flung corners of the globe! a good friend of mine is spending well in excess of that coming from johannesburg.

having said all that – i am a 3-time burner, 2003-2005 and for two of those years, i was very involved in the fire community and spun fire the nights of  the burn. so let’s just say that i was very involved in the scene. in fact my last trip happened right after i started binnelanders. i actually flew back for 2 weeks in order to make my annual pilgrimage to the base of the man. since then i’ve never been in the states at the same time as the burn, so it’s been 4 years since i’ve been able to go.

thank heavens for the internet. i saw a post on one of my mailing lists earlier this year about a new conclave and i signed up via email, and because of my past experience  in the fire community, they’re allowing me to slot in with merely 2 rehearsals so i get to spin again on burn night and i get a discount on my ticket! yay!

however, once i started pulling my old performance wear out of the storage unit, it was abundantly (appropriate word) clear  that there was no way i was going to fit into most of it. this probably being my last time going to the burn in a while,  desperate measures were called for. remember how skinny beyonce suddenly was in “dreamgirls”? well, that was a result of something called the “master-cleanse”, a 10-day lemon, cayenne , maple syrup and water fast/cleanse (description and instructions below). well, i’m on day 7. my last day because i won’t be able to wean myself onto regular food in time for my trip if i go the full 10.

it was pretty uneventful except for the intense migraine which started on the evening of day 3 and went for about 18 hours. it was excruciating and  i was in bed by 8, but by the next night i was much better. most days i found it pretty difficult to finish the lemon drink and had to chug the remainder so that i could go to sleep. from day 4 onward, i started getting much more active – rode my bike a couple of miles. day 6 i got up and went for my first rollerblade in 18 months and then went for a 90 minutes yoga class. today, my last day, will end with a marathon dress rehearsal for the fire conclave, but i have no doubt i’ll be just fine.

i’m certainly looking better for it. i didn’t have a scale for the first 4 days and i seem to have not lost anything more the last 3, but i feel better and i’ve read somewhere that fasting actually can extend one’s life-span. i’m beginning to think that i need to institute a weekly monday water-fast, but i also realistically know that i have all kinds of good intentions when i’m doing the cleanse (this is my 3rd or 4th time), but they don’t always stick.

but i am going to look much better at burning man than i would have a mere week ago! 😉

LEMON DRINK for Master Cleanse

You’ll need:

2 TBsp lemon or lime juice (approx. 1/2 lemon)
2 TBsp genuine organic maple syrup, Grade B (the darker the better)
1/10 Tsp cayenne pepper, gradually increase (the more BTUs the better)
10-14 oz pure water

Combine juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper with water. Drink every 1 to 2 hours. Take no other food, but do drink lots of water in between lemonade drinks. *my modification is that i added psyllium husks to mine to add some roughage, but by day 5 i’d had enough*

Use fresh lemons or limes only, never canned or frozen lemon juice. Use organic and vine ripened when possible. Also, Mix your lemonade fresh just before drinking. Don’t mix it up in the morning for the whole day. You can, however, squeeze your lemons in the morning and measure out the 2 Tbls when needed.

Burroughs recommends a minimum of 10 days on this. You can do 40 days safely and more.

YL Clinic says you can use Agave instead of the maple syrup. Tom Woloshyn (who studied with Stanley Burroughs himself) disagrees. Clinic says if you have diabetes or hypoglycemia, use molasses. If you feel weak or have a sugar imbalance you can add a scoop of Power Meal. Or you can try Master Amino Acid Profile (MAP) for protein without any residuals or strain on the body  more info here: http:/www.weightlossessentials.com/aminoacid.html

NOTE: Be sure to drink plenty of purified water in addition to the lemon juice.

GOING OFF LEMONADE FAST

First Day: Start with 4 oz. fresh squeezed orange juice mixed with 4 oz. water. If it goes well, drink several more 8 oz. glasses of fresh orange juice during the day. Sip slowly. Dilute with water if needed.

Second Day: Drink several 8 oz. glasses of orange juice during the day — with extra water, if needed.

In the evening make a vegetable broth (no canned soup). Use seasonal leafy and root vegetables such as: beets and beet tops, turnips and turnip greens, kale, carrots, onions, parsley, celery, potatoes, okra, one or two inds of legumes, squash, beans, a little salt, cayenne pepper and dehydrated vegetables or veg. powder may be added for flavor (no MSG or hydrolyzed protein).

Cook lightly. Drink the broth, eating only a few bites of the vegetables.

Third Day: Orange juice in the morning. At noon have some more soup with some of the vegetables. No meat, fish, eggs, bread, pastries, tea, milk, or coffee. For Dinner, have the vegetables in the soup.

Fourth Day: Orange juice or lemon and maple syrup in the morning. Fruits, vegetables, seeds, nuts for lunch. Salad or fruit for dinner.

Fifth Day: Eat normally but no junk food, dairy, tea, coffee, white flour or white rice, heavy animal proteins. If, after eating is resumed, distress or gas occurs, go back to the lemonade diet for a few days until the system is ready for food.

—————————————————-
SALT WATER FLUSH:

Start each morning with 1 quart of water and 2 tsp. sea salt (NOT iodized salt). Mix well and chug dow

the bottom line

so, the whole weight thing…….

i hate to admit that i’ve gained back all the weight that i lost when i was at the height of my 10k training. in order to protect my skin recovering from the laser peel disaster, i have to be extremely careful about exposure to the sun, so i cannot run on the track except really early mornings and  then due to the upper respiratory infections i have to be careful of smog, dust and pollen levels for my sometimes asthmatic lungs and highly finicky sinuses. do i need any further excuses?! aargghhh!

i have been feeling exceedingly tired, demoralized and unmotivated lately when it comes to exercise. i can’t believe that 6 weeks ago, i was ready to run a 10k! it seems so far beyond me now, even though  i know that once i start, i’ll soon be hooked again. getting started is the major issue though. i’ve done the odd tae-bo class here in my living room, but i need consistency!

i feel like i’ve been a spectator to my steadily climbing scale and dropping fitness levels. watching it like the proverbial train wreck you can’t take your eyes off, yet can do nothing about. but the truth is i can do something about this – i’ve just once again had to hit bottom. ha, there it is again, the endless puns – i’m getting so far behind i’m in front of myself, “big bottom gals”, scraping bottom, backing things up, ifs and butts, i’m so bummed, “she’s a brick..”, “i like big …” – ok, i think you get the picture. amazing how many songs there are celebrating big booties!

celebrations in song notwithstanding, i am recalibrating. the aim now is to run the spar ladies race, 12 october.

so here goes. bottom line is, i’ll be running my butt off… 😉

backing that thing up…

so, (indulge my navel-gazing please); following on from my earlier post about reaching bottom – let me back up here (snicker) and say publicly;

i know i’m not obese.

i’m not even close to obese.  i’m sure there are many women who would love to have my shape, weight, whatever (you know, the grass is always greener…). i could probably gain 20lbs and still be in the “acceptable” weight range for my height – not even counting the substantial amount of leg muscle i’ve gained over the past few months from all my running. 

Publicity pic June 08 -Ivan Naude

however, i am heavier than i’ve ever been (or at least close) and my clothes don’t fit the way i’d like them to. (though, admittedly the wardrobe stand-by on set yesterday commented on how much weight i’m losing and how good my wardrobe was looking!) and no, it’s not all in my head! 

the problem, which i know some women would kill for, is the fact that though i maintain my overall shape, which has always been hour-glass, there’s just MORE of it. so my boobs get huge, the badonk-adonk, goes badonk-adonk-donk and i start feeling like i’m carrying a second person around with me. 

anyway, i can honestly say i was nowhere near the front, or the back, of the line when they were handing out beauty (ok, so maybe i was a little closer to the front when it  came to T&A), but i got given enough to appreciate my place in line and i learnt over the years how to  fake it. so don’t think me ungrateful. 

Pic by Mike Broemer circa '97/98

it’s just that at 44, i’m looking back and realizing that that body i was complaining about 10 years ago, was F@#$ING hot and i want it back (or even something just a little closer to it)! so much so that i’m okay with the fact that everything hurts today after my marathon gym session the other night. a few more sessions and the pain should fade into distant memory – till the next time.

reaching bottom… if’s and butts

 


Big Butt Chair

 

uhm, this running thing…. hasn’t quite worked out the way i planned. 

life and work seem to stick out their peg legs and trip up my training schedule. by now i was supposed to have completed my 10k, lost 10lbs, be svelte and muscular, in short, bionic woman. well, uhmn…not.

i long ago stopped following the original couch to 10k plan, what with injuries and long days at the studio and even though i’ve managed to get up to 8k’s last week, i haven’t been able to make it back to the track since. admittedly i did plan to make it to the track saturday, but i woke up to a day more grey and horrid than a pile of belly lint. plus cold enough to make the proverbial witches tit shrivel up even further and fall right off. so much for my planned track outing – i wound up on the couch under multiple comforters, watched the boob toob and knitted up a storm (yeah, i’m getting used to the “grandma” comments at work, but at least a number of the actors are walking around in various items created by my dexterous fingers). i don’t think i made it out of my pj’s for at least 36 hours, but i did knit my niece a beanie and 2 scarves – yeah, i’m prolific, and at least my fingers got some exercise! 

sunday after waking really late, i felt sufficiently sloth-like to make me use the old mind over matter trick and take myself to the gym. i was planning on doing some interval training, but i started listening to “this american life” on my ipod and then just kept running, so wound up doing a 5 minute walk, stretched, then ran 40 minutes/5k’s (the treadmill, as i’ve said before, seems to measure distance differently to the track, so it seems to take much longer to cover any distance).

anyway to get back to what i said earlier, this running thing hasn’t worked out quite the way i planned. 

i haven’t been able to train as often as i when i started out, but when i started out, i was out at the track, running maybe 1k, or 2. now i’m running between 5 and 8k’s every time and still i find myself heavier than i’ve ever been in my life. i think i’ve gained about 6k’s since i moved from l.a. – that’s about 15lbs! jeez! i’m horrified as i’m figuring this out right now! every time i think that i’ve finally reached my upper limit, or my bottom (ha-not-so-bloody-ha) to use program speak, i seem to exceed my expectations and my scale yet again. it’s gotten so drastic, i’ve even started back at the gym. i’m even considering “weight watchers”. 

topanga sasssthe irony is, i was a fitness instructor in l.a. for many years and taught endless kick-boxing classes. i was ACE certified, so i know the theory of how to reverse this awful trend, and yet…

i feel though, like i’m hitting my bottom (pun intended) or at least getting close. it’s time to lose the winter coat. time to use the many hula hoops sitting around, jump into the hoop and start unloading some. especially what with world hoop day coming soon – 8.8.08.

watch this space!