starting a scene…

it’s not been the easiest week. i came back from pretoria a week ago and while stuck in the ubiquitous traffic that goes with the N1 highway, i started sneezing and my nose started that old familiar trick of trying to run off my face.

i was in bed by 8, feeling like death. by the next morning i knew i had to get to the doc asap, which i wisely did. it seems that  all i ever see her for are my chronic sinus infections, though it seems lately i’m not the only one. anyway, i immediately started the mountain of meds and i expected to be all hale and hearty again by the next morning. not so much. it took at least 5 days before i started feeling vaguely better. felt like such a waste. felt like a setback in my training schedule at the gym just when i was really getting into it. and it makes me feel so negative and then i get down on myself for not being a little ray of sunshine.

have been feeling kind of strange. like i’m in an emotional limbo. feeling a weird sense of anticipation – like something’s about to happen, and i have no idea what that something might be. it’s not a bad feeling, just an un-known. maybe it has something to do with our show going soon from half hour to an hour daily and all the new actors coming in to join the cast. maybe it has to do with the strange and unsettling experience that was survivor. being on that island and living the reality of it and then seeing the crafted version – “this program is based on true events” – in which i hardly seem to feature.

and i’m just feeling once again like this:

I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be;

Am an attendant lord, one that will do

To swell a progress, start a scene or two  …T.S.Elliot

maybe it has to do with the fact that after almost 4 years i’m finally getting my day in court. shortly after i returned from the states i narrowly missed having a shot-gun pellet take my eye out. instead that pellet still sits lodged in my eye-lid, millimeters from  my eye where the bone of my eye-socket stopped it. long story, but i’m suing the security company and next wednesday we get to face each other in court.

and i’m trying to finish the interminable divorce papers before the 6 month window closes (yes, it’s been almost 6 months since we started the filing process!).

anyway, this sounds like one long whinge, but i haven’t had the time to blog lately and i guess the blogs i appreciate most are the ones where the writer shares both the highs and the lows of the rollercoaster ride which is this life we live.

so here, let’s go, come take a dip with me…

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13 thoughts on “starting a scene…

  1. Sheesh, 6 months already!!
    Its rather odd to hear you talk about Survivor, I always wondered what the contestants thought of the processing of the show and how they were depicted after the recording.

  2. Sandi, I was so disappointed not to see more of you in Survivor. I couldn’t believe that you basically didn’t feature in this weeks TC – I was there when it was recorded and you had a lot to say, yet: Nothing.
    And just want to say, I’ve also had those unknown feeling of something that might happen… so weird. Hope the dip turns into a high place very quickly.

  3. Ek hoor jou.

    I have the sinus nonsense at the moment and have been booked off this week… and I just don’t feel better.

    I also feel kak for not being a ray of sunshine. 😦

    PS. I only watch Survivor ’cause u in it dammit.

  4. Sorry to hear you are feeling so crappy but sinus will suck the life out of you.

    When I was preggies, I got the absolute best sinus advice ever – go to the Physiotherapist. Let them do ultrasound and infra reed treatment. If they do needles as well, all the better. I promise you, it is instant relief without all the medicine. After about 3 treatments you are fine.

  5. Sorry to hear about your suck-ass illness. I HATE being sick (well everybody probably does) but having to work, run a household with 2 small-completely-dependent-on-me-kids is hard enough when your well but if you feel like dying it just plainly SUCKS!!!

    Hope you feel better soon and that that 6th sense instinct feeling turns out to be a good one!

    Oh I started writing a new blog and would love it for you to visit!

    http://mommanats.blogspot.org

    Cheers!

  6. Shit, just looking at that bloody roller coaster made my heart sink in fear.

    I hope you feel right as rain again my lovely!

    xoxo

    Oh, please resend me your number – I’ve lost everyones!

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