may i admit that i am, at this moment, in a very quiet way, happy?

original image by Janice Dunn

my life is in so many ways uncertain. i have no idea what will happen next. i am feeling this global recession as severely as the next person. i’m soon going to be self-employed.  i’ve been suffering the worst migraine ever. mercury has turned retrograde. again. but i’m sort of happy. and i’m saying it out loud. cos i think whenever i feel this way, i’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always waiting for the moment to pass, not fully appreciating the now because i’m so aware of the fact that all emotions are transient. that the wheel is constantly turning. that we have to experience the entire gamut of emotions in order to fully appreciate them all, the good and the bad, the sheer exuberance of joy and the dreadful doldrums of unhappiness.

but.

today i woke early. i got a quick cuddle before i scurried off into the cold. i worked. i finished off a few knitting projects. i crossed a few items off my to-do list. i hula-hooped to justin timberlake in my living room. i hung out with my dogs. it stormed and my roof didn’t leak. i had smoked oysters and sliced tomato and herzoggies for lunch.  i had a good chat with a lovely friend.

and i realized that i’m quietly happy and that even if it lasts just for this moment, i’m going to acknowledge it.

and whatever happens next, it will all be ok.

everything is going to be alright.