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kali-phoenix

image by paul freeman

i think i manifested kali this week. the goddess of death and destruction, the goddess of time and change, but also the triple goddess of creation, preservation and change.

it lasted but a day or two. slash and burn, a swift immolation of what was, to make way for what is coming. it was fast. i was furious. and then i woke up with an almost preternatural calm, knowing that it was done. i didn’t need that manifestation anymore. i felt myself expand, i felt my chest crack open with a deep amazing love and appreciation for love given, lessons learned, even for the searing flames come to burn away all so that this phoenix can once again rise from the ashes. 

it is time. i keep myself open to receive to gifts the universe is about to bestow. 

 

quiet now

i can be like a cornered animal when hurt. vicious. i can be the uncontrollable bitch snarling at the end of a leash. and i’m sorry for that. i’ve had my teeth unsheathed, angry and scared,  but i’m going to be quiet now. i’m back to who i really am - the better version of me.

i loved.

i lost.

but there’s so much i gained. and i’m glad for that. 

and i’m keeping my heart open.

green-leaf-red-heart

time for nothing

 

time  

strange how time can flex  

contracting and expanding
at will
sometimes it’s candy gobbled
with a fat-faced greed
disappearing with 
a speed that makes one spin
other times 
the day 
stretches into infinity 
like treacle
elastic and sticky
and the clock stays stuck
for hours at the 
same face you perused
merely
but a minute ago

nothing

take everything
leave nothing behind
nothing that looks or smells
or tastes like you
leave no reminder
that once i held you in regard
that once i gave you haven in my heart
yes
take everything
i want nothing to remind  

i do not wish to find a single trace
of what a fool i was 
i do not want to face the fact
that what i got from you 
was nothing
so yes
take everything
leave nothing behind

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